Kayaking up the Khyber

Felt the need to add my own insights into the sea kayak adventure undertaken by us ladies whilst the gents sipped beer on their luxury craft, as I felt this section had been grossly under represented especially for comedy value!

Still am uncertain how I persuaded my sister that kayaking with 2 reasonably young kids in double sea kayaks in the Pacific ocean would be a good idea. I think she had very little time to consider the magnitude of the feat she was about to undertake until she turned up at Shute Harbour that early Tue morning. As the nutty New Zealander, who was to be our guide, proceeded to run through safety proceedings: paddle technique, steering advice and a rough itinerary which involved paddling to Hamilton Island; a journey which had taken 45 minutes on a catamaran doing 20 knots the day before, my sisters face turned a shade of green. I also began to have misgivings as he explained the importance of paddling in unison with your partner; remembering the last time we had taken Ciara out in a canoe when she had screamed at Grant on three separate occasions in the space of ten minutes,"I've lost my oars daddy " and that was on a calm canal in Scotland!
" Do you think it would be possible for the little one to just sit up front and watch ?"I asked desperately.
"Oh yes if you think you are capable of rowing a double kayak by yourself " came the reply.
"MMmm" I nervously whispered .

Thus armed with waterproof skirts worn above the nipple line, a bottle of water, life jackets and a quick prayer to anyone who was listening we set off.

It soon became apparent that Sam and me would be bringing up the rear as the various couple sped away in some kind of crazy race along with the instructor. We barely managed to keep them in our line of sights especially as I was keeping my eyes on the cruise ship heading out of the small harbour mouth, at speed and on a collision course with me! Well that's how it seemed from my angle.

After a good 30 minutes paddling we finally caught up with the rest of the group who'd been sunning themselves in a mangrove at the edge of the harbour mouth.
"OK that was your quick rest!" The kiwi shouted, "and now onwards."
"What about us?" I was heard to scream as they once again took off in some sort of recreation of the Americas cup .
"Just remember to keep paddling and don't stop or the tidal current will sweep you back and oh it gets a bit choppy out at this point."

A bit choppy, a bit choppy, it appeared more like a series of 10ft tsunamis as I fought the savage waters ahead: dehydrating, feeling queasy, lactic acid accumulating in my arms at the rate of knots and my lovely daughter in the prow shouting,
"I'm getting wet, can't I row now!"

I seemed to have overtaken Sam at this point and understood why once I'd cleared the worst of the turbulent waters when I looked back and caught her sunning herself whilst Caitlin wrestled the waves stoically: a point she hotly denies!
One hour later and we reached some sort of rocky island . I was the last to arrive watched by all and sundry who were tucking into the fruit and nuts and resting on the beach.
"What happened to Hamo?" I asked ( well you can see I was picking up the local lingo)
"I was only joking about that" laughed the kiwi as I heaved a huge sigh of relief.
I now had a large blister on my left hand and and an empty pit where my stomach should be and no bloody sea turtles- not one. However the swim just off the island made up for all the effort as I donned yet another ridiculous looking stinger suit and swam gently in the beautiful warm turquoise waters surrounded by fantastic views of the Whitsunday Islands.
This moment of idyllic tranquility was shred to pieces as our now much hated leader shouted from shore
" OK back to the boats for another paddle"

I have to say the tiredness overcame Sam and me on the journey home as we descended into fits of giggles playing bumper boats. Also watching Caitlin get the better of Sam and refusing to paddle properly at times had me in stitches. Still we arrived back in one piece although my arms have yet to recover!